Friday the THIRTEEN-th

task 13: Life with my family

Being the eldest daughter of a four-member family looked like an easy job but it’s actually 180 degree-opposite.

I was never raised by my family as a dependent bratinella. I learned to be independent in life and made decisions for myself. But I will always admit to have a housekeeper every once in a while.

I am proud to say that I never lacked discipline from my parents. From reprimands to physical assaults, my mind and body suffered them all. A typical Filipino family is what I have.

But after the tragedy happened, differences made their way before us. We need to change a LOT of our daily routines and attitudes. It’s very hard, really really hard. In the process of changing, blood, sweat and tears flowed out of me in straining out the best that I could be. I worked hard both in school and in the house we currently live in. I even experienced the paranoia where everything else around me were all blurred. I was distant with the world, secluding myself in a safer place, away from pressure and reprimands from my parents.

At this moment of time, we are a one of the rare families that still exchange “i love you” and kisses and hugs. We still go to church every Sunday and sometimes even go out to see a movie on the weekends. But as time passed by, distance grew so does the mind. I developed fear inside, fear of what could happen next, of what mistake I would do in the future causing me to give up something just because they don’t approve of what I’ve been doing. It’s complicated and frightening but I believe, These are just challenges God imposed unto us to strengthen our faith and our bond.

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